SALAMAT. THANK YOU. AGYAMANAK. GRACIAS. MIRIAM COLLEGE PATUNGO SA MUNDO.

Dahil ako'y nagtapos na sa kolehiyo, marapat lamang na ipahayag ko rin sa pamamagitan ng post na ito ang aking sariling mensahe ng pagtatapos.

Unang-una sa lahat, maraming salamat sa Diyos dahil Siya ang dahilan ng lahat ng ito. Tunay ngang ang plano Niya ang pinaka-the best. May mga plano akong hindi Niya pinahintulot at nagpapasalamat ako dahil ngayon ko napagtanto kung gaano nakatulong sa akin ang kanyang mga napiling mangyari sa buhay ko. Sa aking pagsuong sa mas malaking mundo, alam kong hindi Siya titigil upang patuloy akong gabayan. Panginoon, salamat po sa lahat!

Sunod kong nais pasalamatan ang lahat ng taong naging bahagi ng buhay ko sa Miriam College. Salamat sa Tulong-Dunong Scholarship Program at sa Miriam Collge Financial Aid na siyang mga pangunahing dahilan upang makamit ko ang mataas na antas ng edukasyon sa pinagmamalaki kong Miriam College, ang aking Alma Mater. Salamat sa lahat ng mga naging propesor ko mula una hanggang ikaapat na taon. Nagpapasalamat ako dahil kahit ano'ng mangyari, LAHAT sila'y may naidulot na kaalaman at aral na nakadagdag sa aking paglaki. Maraming salamat, mga mahal kong propesor! Salamat din sa Departamento ng Komunikasyon, sa Kolehiyo ng Arts and Sciences, sa Kolehiyo ng Edukasyon, sa Center for Peace Education, sa Administrative Services Office, at sa College Guildance Center. Sa buong Miriam College, kayo'y nakatulong nang malaki sa akin. Maraming maraming salamat po!

Sa Communication Section 3 at Section 5 at sa lahat ng mga naging kaklase ko sa apat na taon ko sa kolehiyo, maraming salamat sa lahat ng mga alaala! Sa mga nabuong barkada ko: sa MC Keidi at sa Marekois, maraming salamat sa inyo, mga bruha! Alam kong hindi dito magtatapos ang lahat! Mahal ko kayo! Muwah!

Sa mga organisasyong kinabilangan ko sa Miriam at sa lahat ng naging officers at kamiyembro ko rito: sa Communication Arts and Advertising Society (CAASOC) na naging Communication Society (CommSoc), sa Talitha Cumi (dinadalangin kong lagi nating tatandaan ang ating motto: RISE UP, LITTLE GIRL!), sa Philosophy Society, Humanities Club, Cillo Society, sa apat na councils, at sa Sanggunian ng Mag-aaral ng Miriam. Maraming salamat sa inyo! Salamat nga pala sa Sanggu para sa baller. Malugod kong isusuot ito kahit ako'y nagtatrabaho na. :)

Isang espesyal na pasasalamat sa C*CATT Street at sa Orange Dance Studio sa paghubog sa akin upang maging mahusay na dancer, events coordinator at organizer, at pinuno ng grupo. Salamat sa mga kabatch ko sa grupo: kina Lyane, Marge, at Micha at sa mga maiiwan naming miyembro. Inyong ipagpatuloy ang pamana ng C*CATT Street! Go, C*CATT!!! Salamat din sa mga alumni na walang sawa sa pagsuporta at lalo na kay Nay Jen at kay Tay Dex na nagsilbing mga magulang ng grupo. Salamat din sa LAHAT ng aking mga nakasama sa Orange Dance Studio! Kay rami n'yo, di ko na kayo isa-isahin! Hehe. Salamat nang sobra! Salamat din kina Gng. Lynda Garcia at sa ADSA ng Miriam College sa paniniwala sa kakayahan ng C*CATT Street. Maraming salamat sa inyong lahat!!! Patuloy kong babalikan ang dance floor at papatibukin ang pusong aking iniwan doon dala-dala ang mga alaala ko kasama kayo. Hanggang sa muli, C*CATT Street at ODS! Hanggang sa muli!

Alam ng lahat na noon pa man maliban sa pagsasayaw, kakambal ko na ang papel at panulat. Salamat sa mga naging gabay ko sa pagsusulat sa kolehiyo: kay Sir Joel Toledo, Ms. Lorna Billanes, Ms. Rachelle Dizon-Rodulfo, Ms. Debbie Tan, Ms. Cathy Guballa, Ms. Michelle Gadja, Ms. Ava Gonzales, at kay Sir Jonah Lim. Nais ko ring pasalamatan sina Kuya Jopaw Villarosa at Kuya KC Ramos na naging mga guro ko rin sa Ingles at hanggang ngayon ay patuloy ang pagsuporta sa aking mga gawain. Maraming salamat po sa inyong lahat!

Sa mga nakasama ko sa Ondine (Theater) at sa Kapatid (Film), salamat! Hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan si Hans, si Becca, si Reina, si Tom, at si Zeny. Maraming salamat!!!

Salamat din sa mga hindi nakakalimot na Tablemates, TD Gang, at mga kabatch ko sa MCS, MES, at sa St.Scho Marikina! Nawa'y kahit palawak na nang palawak ang ating mundo, hindi pa rin natin makalimutan ang pagkakaibigang ating nabuo. Maraming salamat sa lahat ng alalala!!

Tunay ngang ang hindi lumingon sa pinanggalingan ay hindi makararating sa paroroonan, kaya naman, hindi ko hahayaang matapos ang post na ito nang hindi pinasasalamatan ang aking pamilyang tulad ko ay mga babaeng empowered. Kay Lola Tuning, kay Mama, kay Ate May, at kay Keren, maraming salamat sa pagpapadama sa akin na ako nga'y may tunay pa ring tahanan sa kabila ng lahat ng tahanang aking natagpuan sa buhay. Salamat sa pagbibigay sa akin ng gamilyong pagkakataon sa tuwing ako'y may pagkakamali. Salamat sa pagmamahal at sa pagiging nariyan kapag wala na ang lahat. Ang aking pagtatapos ay para sa inyo at para sa ating busilak na hinaharap. Mahal na mahal ko kayo! Lola, hanggang sa muli po nating pagkikita!

Sa nag-iisang tinik sa hilera ng mga rosas, salamat po! Anuman ang mangyari, wala ka pa rin pong kapalit. Maghihilom din ang mga sugat pagdating ng tamang panahon. Hanggang sa muli po nating pagkikita.

Nais ko ring pasalamatan ang aking mga kamag-anak na walang sawa rin ang suporta sa akin at sa aking pamilya. Salamat kay Uncle Levy na siyang pumayag na ipag-drive kami sa araw ng pagtatapos kahit gaano kabagal ang traffic at kahit biglaan lang din namin siyang nasabihan. Salamat ulit, Uncle. Pagupit ka na, please? Hahaha! Biro lang!

Hindi matutumbasan ng kahit anong medalya o masigabong handaan ang abut-abot na biyayang aking natanggap sa pag-agos ng mga panahon. Ang mga alaalang babaunin ko sa aking pagharap sa mundo na mula sa lahat ng mga taong nakasama at nakatuwang ko ay higit pang regalo at inspirasyon sa aking pagtatapos. Sa lahat ng aking nabanggit, MARAMING SALAMAT! THANK YOU! AGYAMANAK! GRACIAS! Sa mga hindi ko na nabanggit sa post na ito, paumanhin. Inyo sanang tandaan na sa malaki o maliit mang bagay na inyong naidulot sa akin, kahit sandali lang kayong napadaan sa buhay ko, nagpapasalamat pa rin ako! SALAMAT MULA SA KAIBUTURAN NG AKING PUSO!!!

Pagpalain nawa tayo lahat ng Diyos at tulad ko, mapuno nawa ang ating mga buhay ng inspirasyon. Muli, maraming salamat! Salamat, Miriam College! Paalam! Hanggang sa muli! :D

"Para sa 'yo ako'y lalaban... Ako'y lalaban...
Ang awiting ito'y para sa iyo
At kung maubos ang tinig, 'di magsisisi
Dahil iyong narinig mula sa labi ko,
SALAMAT... SALAMAT..."

"Gave me strength when I had none at all
Gave me hope when I was running low
Showed me how to make it through and
For everything, you know I thank you

You believed when I'd no reason to
You were there when I needed you...
You believed when I had given up
Carried me and I was lifted up...

And I'm still standing here,
I JUST WANNA THANK YOU..."

Krizelle Ripani Talladen
Miriam College Batch 2011
BA Communication

March 27, 2011

Of Hair Rebond and the Sea

I had my hair rebonded last March 13, 2011 and other than the transforming effect of what was put on my hair, it was the article that I read from a magazine while waiting for my hair to set that made me enjoy my stay in the salon. It was actually the first magazine that I picked from the stack that was given to me. We’re meant to be! Haha! It was Metroactive’s Summer Issue in 2008.

I read an article there about Juny Binamira, one of the few boat makers here in the Philippines. Yes, you read it right—Boat Maker, one who makes, builds, and creates boats for whatever purpose. It was a very inspiring story because he said there that he had the fascination for boat making since he was a young boy and he was able to create his first boat when he was around 9 years old, I think. Well, it runs in the blood. Juny is related to a national artist for sculpture. I just can’t remember who. Haha! I forgot, sorry!

I, myself, am a lover of the sea. My friends would find me a kill joy when I wouldn’t participate in swimming getaways by the pool. I really don’t like pools. I’m more amused with the sea, the breeze, the foam, the sunset in the background… My gosh! I miss Pagudpud, Corimao, and San Mateo in Ilocos! I just so love the sea! Haha! Maybe in my past life, I really was a turtle! Haha!

Anyway, let me quote Jury Binamira when he said in the article, “Anybody who loves the sea knows the peace that the sea is capable of bringing to a human being. There’s just something about the sea. That’s why it’s very therapeutic being there.”

Very well said, Mr. Binamira!

I just love the sea. And I love my hair also now because, like the sea, it flows. Haha! And just like the sea and my hair, my life flows to where God directs. Now there’s the connection!

Peace to you all! :D

Krizelle R. Talladen
March 22, 2011

The Songs of the End

“I stopped and got lost in my mind

I’ve never been so unraveled in my whole life…”

I never knew why I felt like this. When all the stars had gone to the air and to my nostrils as sources of all strength to do what I had to do, I was surprised. They were very effective. It really felt as though it was the most casual and natural thing to say. I was stuck there sitting, moving with utmost limitation, and not wanting my nervousness to show. I was closed. I even wanted him to stay inches away, not beside me but in front of me, like an opponent in my most favorite game—talk. I have never been that honest. Despite the uneasiness I felt, it was successful. I didn’t freak out that much. I didn’t cry. I didn’t hurt my little sister (like how I used to when I’m so love struck). I just breathed, smiled, and laughed as usual.

“I said I love you, I love you, I love you,

But now I regret it,

Said I love you, I love you, I love you,

I’m so sorry I said it…”

I saw stupidity in what I did. Some said it was even inappropriate. Of course, here comes again the female stereotype which I always hate. But then the stupidity that I saw is far less than the gravity of the accomplishment that I have established. It is I who won over the monsters of my past. It was like I’ve made up for all the regrets I had for the past 11 years.

“I know I’ve said it

But can we forget this?”

And he said nothing will change. Thank you. But then, I think it’s normal for me to feel the awkwardness afterwards. How will I act if I see him again? Will I be the usual jolly girl who can smile right at the iris of his eyes? I can’t even look at him straight when I was blurting everything out. Hohoho! Hello, shy girl! Don’t be shy! Hahaha!

“Shy girl, it’s written on your face…

Don’t run away, don’t be afraid,

Don’t be shy, girl…”

OK. I know I’ve said it so can we just forget it like I didn’t say anything? OK. Let’s see. Haha!

“I’m like a statue, stuck staring right at you…”

But still, I got frozen in my tracks. I always stop thinking about everything from the start of it all until the end of whatever, if this is really ending like this. This unexplainable feeling covers all my experiences with the rest of the people whom I’m with. That one moment of bravery opened the doors to reminiscing what has been. It’s just overwhelming, no words can ever describe. Only sets of songs from previous and present LSS’s rush through me as if I really have a good voice that I just belt each song out. I’m just stuck, like a statue, staring at everything from them, from them, then from you up to me. I want to cry to release some of this unexplainables. But then I can’t. No tear drop won’t come out of these tear glands that I’ve been knocking on. Hello, tears? All dried up? Am I numb? What is happening?

“Every single day of my life, I thank my luck stars

God really had to spend extra time when he sculptured your heart.

Cause there’s no explanation, can’t solve the equation

It’s like you love me more than I love myself….”

Yeah. Why should I answer the unanswerable? When it is a mystery, why should I force an explanation? If there’s none and it’s just there, just let it be. The purpose will surely reveal itself ASAP. Yeah? All right!

“When the day is said and done

In the middle of the night

When you’re fast asleep, my love…

I’m the luckiest man alive.”

I just stare at all these realities. Then I say to myself: “I’m the luckiest person alive.” There. That’s it. I am greatly blessed. Thank you to all of you! You are God’s blessings to me. #

Krizelle R. Talladen

March 18, 2011

Gratitude of The Heart

For M.F.

The skies were starless but the moon shone

The air had let the skins gone cold

The water had fake waves in the four corners

And there it was, the warm beating of a heart.

It never chose whom to beat for,

It just happened without prior notice,

It led the body to move about,

The feet to walk towards directed paths.

The heart pounded to the tune of the lasts

That made the feet to where it landed,

And the body couldn’t seem to relax

Until the lips had spoken the contents of the heart.

As the starless sky continued to darken,

As the air and the towels had dried the skins,

As the water curdled and stilled and curdled again,

There it was, the warm heart, exposed and honest.

It would be the smiles, not the concealment,

It would be the laughter, not just the confession,

It would be the immortal words, not the expressions alone

That made the heart cherish that night the most.

Krizelle R. Talladen

March 17, 2011

2011

The calendar sheds its leaves again
Like the kamias tree beside this small house.
Another year has died and another has bloomed,
No one knows what its new fragrance will bring.


As my feet went back to the paths they’ve taken
My hands gathered the fruits and the flowers
The mementos of the stars and the sunshine
The memoirs worth planting on the next garden.


I spewed out what was not worth keeping,
The rough rocks that hurt the soles of my feet,
The weeds that snatched nutrients from me,
And the rest of the rubbish fit for the pit.


But all of these that I took and left
Made this creature what it is today
And in the next plot, for sure I’ll stay
Grateful for all the pain and the gain.


Now it’s all to the Green Thumb of Above
Whatever is in store for the next coming of the sun
And on every rise of the moon after that
I’m sure no rain will drop on useless land.


The new calendar displays itself
Naked from the dried leaves of yesterday
Prepared for more sprouting and blooming
Ready to spread all its fruits and fragrances.


Krizelle R. Talladen
January 2011